Want to read a happy cheery post? Well this isnt going to be it.

My health is kicking my rear. Its insane that I'm only 25 and have the body of a 60 year old. Seriously I do. I know most don't want to hear about any of this but this is my journal and life isnt always butterflies and sunshine.

Not too many people know that I've been diagnosed with kidney disease. It randomly popped up last summer. Not having insurance I didnt get it taken care of until recently. Its under control right now.

Now... I've had crazy severe anxiety since my papaw died last April... wow its been almost a year. :( And then everything that happened with my family at the end of the year only made it worse. Living near train tracks kills me... I hate it. I cry MANY times a day because I hear them. Anyways I'm getting that under control. I thought my lack of sleep, constant fatigue, constant aches and pains was because of my stress. So I've been going to the doctor for it. I now know that I have Fibromyalgia. To be honest its painful. There are times that the pain is so bad I just sit and cry. I feel so bad for Brandon because all I want to do is sleep. I've started medicine, massage and chiropractic care for it. Hopefully I can get the pain to a manageable spot soon. I should have my blood work back next week to make sure I dont have arthritis. I pray that I dont.

I pray so so hard that my kids do not get my health problems. Having horrible health on both sides of my family I was/am doomed. Please please please Brooks genes be a lot stronger then my Bowles/Ennis genes.